Selfesteem and Love

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Comment by Darrian Ashoka on December 27, 2008 at 12:33pm

Self Esteem and Love
Journal Entry: Sat Dec 27, 2008

What is LOVE? They say you cannot love others if you do not love yourself,
but this seems to be a huge problem, doesn't it?

I understand how we are bombarded with pressure of how those around us want us to be, but I say be strong and true to yourself. The greatest gift you can offer those around you is to be yourself. If you play that game and pretend to be what they want to see of you; then if they thought they were in love with you, they are only in love with your illusion you were compelled to create. So they are not actually in love with you, since they do not even know who you really are.

My Wife seems to fit the #9 personality trait of the anagrams, which is 'I'm OK if your OK', or a people pleaser. Sounds great huh? I have to frequently work to keep her true to herself, so she does not just comply to my wants to avoid conflict, even when it does not suit my needs or desires. If I took advantage of this quirk in her she would not really be happy and our relationship would slowly deteriorate as her needs and wants go unfulfilled.

A sign of true love is when you derive joy seeing your Love happy and fulfilled, even when it does not involve you. Parents who compels their children to do well in School and drive them into a career that is financially secure may believe they are doing what is best for them out of love. Although, if that child's passion is to play the banjo on a Downtown sidewalk for quarters in a hat; it's more than just being supportive, but finding it fills them with great joy to see them living their passion.

A relationship with one's mate need not be so different if it is true LOVE.

Live LOVE
Darrian Ashoka